Don't Ask ‘Clown Questions’ to Joey Bats – Bro (A Jose Bautista Chip)
So I was reading a great piece finger struck by Andrew Stoeten at Blue Jays Nation, where he offers his Stoeten tone thoughts regarding a Jose Bautista interview this past Thursday after Bats arrived at Camp Dunedin. Many avid Blue Jay fans probably have already read Robert Macleod’s Globe And Mail article titled – ‘Jose Bautista Says He Has Nothing To Prove.’ But the real question is -- why are reporters asking these clown questions?
It’s getting rather sapping reading and listening to these ‘Bryce Harper’ style trash questions hurled at Bautista -- I get ‘their’ game, but I question the intentions behind throwing high and inside. And I have to wonder how the fuck GQ Joey handles the media in his fashion without giving some of these plebes a punch in the nose – I know I’d have a hard time fighting off that urge, or trying to control my Joe Pesci’s Tommy DeVito (– ahem – Goodfellas) eyes from the cameras. Yet, Booster Bats has done it on many occasions – kind of, well, in his own way.
Now, I’m not going to lie – I didn’t like the way he stirred up the ‘sweet emotion’ of Spring Training 2016 with his ‘home town discount’ jive followed by the TMZ chimes that he was asking for five-years, 150 million. And I will never forget his (hex) Ryan Merritt ‘shaking in his boots’ comments following the Jays 5 – 1 victory over the Tribe in game 4 – I knew after those Bat words: it was over. If you love him, hate him, or meh him – he has the famed MLB chip on his shoulder and no matter what end of the ‘time cuts like a knife’ curve he is on – he plays with daggers.
The truth is Jays fans that during this past offseason, my golden flags Jay dream saw Dexter Fowler in RF, Pillar in CF, and AndyMcC in LF – with, of course, EE as the 1B/DH platoon, and Bautista was not a part of this ‘pipe team’. I thought Booster Bats would be out of the Big Smoke and that he had puffed that last blue bird cigar.
Anyway, back to the task on hand and moving away from this bogus reflection, Jose Bautista is awesome. He has burnt into all of our memories a moment that we will carry forward for the rest of the flippin’ way. And how can any fan forget his breakout 2010 year, where he rose up with his 54 HRs and 124 RBIs to become the Pizza Pizza cardboard Joey Bats who stared at all of us during our late night maudlin Pizza Pizza ways. Jose Bautista is as much a piece of Torono and Canada as you and me. He is up there with the likes of all the great Jays who brought magic to the diamond.
So reporters of the future ‘scrum’ -- don’t be clowns, Jose is one of the greatest Blue Jays of all time and a Torono story for generations to come. Let’s enjoy this season, let’s enjoy another year with Bautista, and if reporters ask clown questions that are spit in the can – let’s enjoy his bat flippin’ answers.